Monday, July 11, 2011

Am I doing the right thing?

I had a close mother figure in my life all through high school but during my senior year she kind of disowned me. I have always had medical issues and she had been there for me but when I struggled with depression she didnt want the pressure. She cut all ties with me and we didnt speak for months. Now i'm going off to college and i made her a scrapbook of all the good times we had just to remember me by. She acted like she wanted to be close again but keeps going back and forth. We met for lunch and I was hoping she might clear the air but neither of us mentioned what happened 6 months ago. She didnt even really ask how i am now. I dont see how we can even be friends if she feels no remorse over the cold things she said to me when i was at my lowest. I made a plan to meet with her one of these days and say what I need to say. I was really hurt by what she did. It took months of crying and begging God, and therapy for me to even think about it without falling apart. I couldnt believe how little I meant to her. No one in my life wants me anywhere near her but I'm starting to think I need to let myself be heard for once. Would it be right for me to tell her how she made me feel? I dont want anything from her. just closure.

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